Posts tagged "turtle"

You'd think that whenever Teddy Bear shows up, it would sate our obsession with animal noms. But the truth is that the opposite occurs. We want to see more noms.

With that in mind, here's a super dramatic time-lapse video of a tortoise eating a pile of salad. Why time-lapse? Because tortoises are slow, dummy! You don't have all day to watch this and neither do we. Also, because time-lapse is just cooler than regular-lapse. That's a science fact.

We have to say, this parakeet seems a lot more stressed out about its turtle taxi ride than previous animals have been when riding on turtles. Perhaps it didn't realize it was resting on a living creature in the first place. As still as that turtle is for the first chunk of this video, it's not unreasonable to imagine the bird thought it had found a comfortable rock to sit on before it suddenly took off at a speed we can only describe as impressive for what's supposed to be a slow-moving creature.

We can't get enough of turtles lately. We can't get enough of turtles eating things. First it was pumpkin pie; now it's strawberries. Get your nom on, turtles!

Turtles, it turns out, are like some other species in that they may bully each other. But like everything else they do, they do it slowly. That makes it more cruel, we think. The dragging it out. Watch this bully slowly, slowly, inch by inch push his relaxing pal over the edge of this pool. Obviously the victim knew what was coming, but what was he supposed to do? Dash away quick?

We're seriously in love with turtles lately, you guys. Check out this talented little dude. Maybe he's not technically playing the piano, but he's definitely tickling those ivories.

If we could find a turtle to do this with our piano alarm clocks every day, we'd never have a bad morning or show up to work grouchy ever again.

Think about snapping turtles. They were the bogeymen of the lakes and rivers where you'd go swimming as a kid, and with good reason: Even the common snapping turtle can lop off a finger with its powerful jaws. Many of us had a school friend who'd tell a story about a cousin or a bunkmate at summer camp who lost a digit or two to a belligerent snapping turtle.

The surly fellow in this video is not a common snapping turtle; it's an alligator snapping turtle, which is an appropriately terrifying name for these behemoths. Watch it instantly rip a healthy chunk out of that melon, rind and all. Now imagine that melon is your arm or leg. You've got a little more than just fingers to worry about losing if you happen to tick off one of these 175-pound beasties.

Fortunately, you can watch and be amused by this video from the safety of your home, taking comfort in knowing that alligator snapping turtles are native only to the Southeastern United States. If you happen to live in the South... well, stay out of murky waters.

Tell us, readers: Have you ever had a close call with a snapping turtle or other potentially dangerous water-dwelling creature?

Cats are doing it. Dogs are doing it. Even seals are doing it. And now chickens are doing it.

Tortoises: The official vehicle of the animal kingdom

Yesterday we featured a video of a turtle owner comically pretending to scream at his turtle in a fit of rage. Even though the video was obviously tongue-in-cheek and no turtles were emotionally abused in its making, we still felt a little bit guilty about laughing. It was funny, but we just wish there had been a happy ending to it. We wanted to see the turtle get a treat of some sort, at least.

So it is in that spirit that we now present this video of a pet turtle being served the best treat of all: Pie!

It's not necessarily unusual for many pet owners (OK, cat owners) to feel like their animals sometimes act cold, distant or ungrateful. But this turtle owner seems to be coming unhinged. Take it easy, man! How much engagement can you really expect from "some sort of reptilian mammal that looks like a cupcake"? (Science!)

To be fair, though, that turtle does seem very emotionally withholding. What happens when you try to bond with it, try to get close to its heart? ACCESS IS DENIED!

It starts with standing on hind legs, and before you know it, you've got a bunch of teenage mutant ninjas on your hands.

The Star Wars Pets saga continues, now with turtle Jedis getting in on the lightsaber dueling action in place of kittens. Turtles may not be as classically cute as kittens, but they can more than hold their own when it comes to wielding the Force.

You may be saying to yourself, "Yeah, right! As if a turtle has the physical capability to fight with a lightsaber." But didn't we all doubt the physicality of Master Yoda for 20 years before he absolutely trucked Count Dooku in 'Attack of the Clones'? So it is with these turtles. For their ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is.

Do you guys remember that epic frog video from a couple of weeks ago? My heart was in my throat for days from all of the drama there. I'm still reeling, frankly. But just as I'm finally starting to catch my breath and achieve some sense of normality in my life, along comes the epic tortoise to start the process all over again. Warning: intensity ahead.

Strawberries are frustrating. Buy a fresh pint of them at the market and 24 hours later they're half covered in fuzzy mold. You need to act fast. It gives one a good excuse to compulsively consume a whole batch in one sitting--or at least one afternoon. "Oh, I'd better polish these all off immediately lest they go bad." Our shelled friend understands the need for gluttony when it comes to this quick-to-spoil treat. That strawberry is bigger than he is but nevertheless, he's ready to go to town. Waste not, want not; that's what he always says. And anyway it's not as monumental a task as it seems on the surface. These are strawberries we're talking about, the most delicious of all the fruits. It's hardly the same as choking down a handful of disgusting baby carrots in the break room on your afternoon break and pretending you like it.

[via Cute Overload]

"Exterminate! Exterminate! Exterminate!"

I'd always heard of Dr. Who, but I never really knew what it was other than a long-running British science-fiction TV show. For some reason over the last year or so, I'm constantly seeing references to it on the Internet, and it seems like the show's fan base on this side of the pond has exploded recently. Now fans are getting their pets in on the action. This turtle is being chased by daleks, evil aliens from "Dr. Who" who wish to exterminate everything. Or something. I'm not really sure because I'm apparently the last person in the world who hasn't seen this show. This and "Breaking Bad" are still on my to-watch list. Don't give me that look! I know "Breaking Bad" is amazing; that's what everybody tells me. Not everybody has seen every TV show! So I can't tell you what happened last week on "Breaking Bad" and I can't explain in detail why daleks want to exterminate English people and turtles.

Slow and steady wins the race, they said. But what happens when the tortoise and the hare human are on equal ground speed-wise, and the race is a chase? Suddenly things get a little bit more intense. While we'd still have to classify this as a slow-speed pursuit, it bears mentioning that, for a tortoise, that little guy is really bookin' it! Have you ever seen a turtle do anything with that much intensity? That old guy must have done something pretty bad. Possibilities: (1) He stole the turtle's pizza. (2) He attacked the turtle's three brothers. (3) He came from Dimension X.

Look folks; I'm a child of the '80s and '90s; I can't talk about turtles for very long before things devolve into a conversation about the teenaged mutant ninja sort.