Hippopotamus.

You can't hear it, but under the water they're listening to Ponchielli's "Dance of the Hours." ...

At the Berlin Zoo, Kathi the hippo gave birth to a bouncing baby calf. We don't want to call her overprotective, per se, but Kathi literally pushes away her other kids, according to the zoologist. Actually, yes, we will call her overprotective. She won't even let the baby's pop look at him. Although heaven knows he'll be paying for therapy bills for years to come. ...

Burrard-Lucas Paging Lisa Frank! This delightful pink hippopotamus was spotted recently at the Masai Mara National Reserve in Kenya, Africa. Photographers Will and Matt Burrard-Lucas were enjoying a picnic when they saw the whimsically hued hippo and started snapping, according to Fox News. The hippo is probably leucistic, a condition similar to albinism, but characterized by a lack of all types of skin pigmentation instead of only melanin. We'd like the hippo to make friends with that pink dolphin from the Amazon, but it's probably just wishful thinking. Instead, we're planning a trip to Masai Mara to look for green, yellow, and orange hippos that we can put together with this one. Then ...

Kambiri, which translated from Nigerian means "allow me to join this family," is also the name of an adorable pygmy hippo calf, "the first to be reared by its own mother" at the Taronga Zoo in Sydney, Australia. Over the course of the next few weeks, visitors will watch little Kambiri adapt to his surroundings under the careful watch of his mother, Petre. What makes the occasion especially heartwarming is knowing that as few as 3,000 Pygmy Hippos remain in the wild today, so at least zoo attendees will get to witness the 13-kilogram cutie as it sprouts quickly. ...

What we have here is a newborn pygmy hippopotamus calf that we found over at the Daily Squee. And sure, pygmy hippos are much smaller than the normal variety, but as an adult, this little guy is still gonna be an intimidating 600 pounds, with a face full of massive, frightening teeth. But for now, there's nothing intimidating about him. He is the definition of adorable. All we wanna do is give him a squeeze and nuzzle his hippo-y snout. ...