Paul Ciampanelli

No one does "cute" quite like the Japanese. You'd think the ad wizards here in the States would have the presence of mind to slap a necktie and a pair of specs on a cat. I guess if you spend too much time outside the box, you get scooped on an obvious, classic idea like this. Instead, we Yanks get stuck with a talking garden gnome for years and years.

YouTube user sunovia5 helpfully provides a rough translation of the commercial's voiceover dialogue: "'I'm Niyaran. Today big profits are a hard task. (while looking at computer) It's grown! (profits are up!).' Tagline: 'Profitable: Hotel Yakumo.'" So we guess it's a commercial for a hotel that caters to business travelers? Who cares; the silly cat is wearing glasses and taking a plane ride! Cuuuuuuuute!

You pretty much have to be cute on some level to make it as a star on the Disney Channel. And if degree of cuteness dictates level of success, then Miley Cyrus must be the cutest Disney Channel star of all time. But she's hedging her bets.

Just to keep her cuteness locked down for a little longer, Cyrus -- aka Hannah Montana -- recently was spotted out and about with her adorably fuzzy new puppy in her arms.

His name is Mate, inspired by Cyrus's nickname for her Australian boyfriend. No word yet to confirm the pooch's breed, but really, who cares? The thing is adorable as all getout. Isn't that all we really need to know?

Holy mackerel!

Holy catfish, rather. This 15-stone, 4-pound catfish (that's 214 pounds to Yanks like you and me) broke records recently when a woman wrestled the leviathan from a Spanish river while on vacation, reports the (U.K.) Daily Mail. As if that feat wasn't impressive enough, the accomplished angler in question happens to be a mere 5'3" in stature, a grandmother, and legally blind. The superwoman, Shiela Penfold, 56, took 30 minutes to bag the beast.

The monstrous catfish, dragged from the depths of the River Ebro near Barcelona, measured a terrifying 8 feet, 2 inches in length. Penfold used halibut pellets as bait to supplement what we presume is her superhuman strength.

"I was exhausted but elated afterward," Penfold told the Daily Mail. "I'm still walking around with a smile on my face. But it goes to show that just because you are blind it doesn't stop you breaking records like this."

After snapping a few photographs of the catfish that will give you nightmares for the rest of your life, Penfold released her vanquished opponent back into its freshwater home.

Last summer, we reported the story of Casper, a 12-year-old cat from Plymouth, England who bizarrely but charmingly lined up every morning at 10:55 to take the same 11-mile round trip on the No. 3 bus. Now we are saddened to learn that Casper has died, struck and killed by a car, according to the (U.K.) Daily Mail.

Casper's owner, Susan Finden, told the Daily Mail that the driver who hit Casper did not stop after running over the cat. "Casper died from his injuries," Finden said.

Casper was, in fact, crossing the street to catch his usual No. 3 bus when he was struck by the car that killed him. "Casper was quite quick for his age but I was trying to stop him from riding the bus so much," Finden told the Daily Mail. "He had no road sense whatsoever."

Finden posted a sign at Casper's bus stop to let commuters know that they'd no longer be enjoying the company of the cat of whom they'd grown so fond. "He will be greatly missed," Finden said. "Thank you to all those who befriended him."

Another week, another bear-cub zoo debut. "We'll see your 5-month-old panda and raise you a 3-month-old polar bear," Japan taunted San Diego this week. "Not fair," San Diego's Yun Zi protested after watching the video below. "That polar bear gets her own stuffed toy polar bear to play with. That's adorable. How am I supposed to compete with that?" The dejected panda cub then waddled off into a patch of bamboo to eat his feelings.

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