• Cathy Unruh
    1 of 17

    As Valentine's Day approaches, it is important to work on all our relationships, including those with our pets. Cats seem to send mixed messages about how they feel. Some kitties are all cuddles, but the next moment you have a feisty feline. To help us understand the relationships cats have with their owners and others, we talked to expert Cathy Unruh. Unruh knows quite a bit about keeping kitty relationships under control, through her experiences with cat training and taming a feral cat of her own. Unruh recently used the latter experience as inspiration for her book, "Taming Me: Memoir of a Clever Island Cat."

    Read on to get Unruh's advice on better understanding your cat and how training can help. 

  • PawNation.com
    2 of 17

    Sometimes my cat approaches me and bites me for what seems like no reason. After I start giving her attention, she acts like nothing happened and lets me pet her. Why would she bite me out of nowhere like this?

  • Thinkstock
    3 of 17

    ANSWER:

    Your cat has a very good reason for these little love bites: She is asking for your attention. Cats nip each other when grooming, playing and sharing affection. So, she is inviting you to pet her — and she wouldn't even mind if you nipped her back!

  • PawNation.com
    4 of 17

    My boyfriend's cat is super sweet to him, but doesn't seem to like me. Whenever I am over, the cat will lay at my feet and roll around, but when I go to pet him, he will hiss and swat at me. Why does he act like this? And how can I gain the cat's trust?

  • Thinkstock
    5 of 17

    ANSWER:

    I am going to assume that this is your boyfriend's only cat, and that your boyfriend is his chief companion. If so, the cat is very likely feeling a bit jealous and possessive. The rolling at your feet may be an enticement to reach out to him or a demonstration of mixed emotions, as the cat may be trying to adapt to you. I suggest speaking sweetly to the cat, using his name, but not trying to touch him. Let him take his time in initiating physical contact with you; when he finally jumps in your lap and accepts your caresses, you will know you've arrived!

  • PawNation.com
    6 of 17

    My cat adores all people and is very social. Unfortunately, whenever we try to introduce her to an animal of any kind she becomes very stand-offish and aggressive. What causes her to treat humans so differently than animals?

  • Alamy
    7 of 17

    ANSWER:

    If your cat has grown up with humans as "an only child," it may be that she simply accepts humans as her appropriate companions and has no interest in forming bonds with other animals, especially if you are trying to introduce the other animal on her home turf or personal territory. There may also have been some sort of trauma in her past that causes her to be leery of other animals. If you ever wish to introduce another animal into the home as a full-time resident, be sure to get advice on how best to do that. Most cats, even the most seemingly solitary ones, will adjust to another animal companion when given enough time and space.

    RELATED: Learn More About Cathy Unruh

  • PawNation.com
    8 of 17

    For the first time, I have a very cuddly cat. She sleeps on my chest every night and always wants to be on my lap when I am awake. What could make her so much more affectionate than cats I have had before?

  • Alamy
    9 of 17

    ANSWER:

    Cats, like people, are individuals with their own distinct personalities. It sounds as though you have found the "lap cat" that so many humans crave. There could be any number of reasons for this, but whatever the reason, your cat is continuing her kittenhood behavior with you.  Kittens love to cuddle and sleep in clumps; they are used to the sound of multiple heartbeats.  Your cat has carried this craving for closeness into adulthood and you are the beneficiary. Enjoy!

  • PawNation.com
    10 of 17

    I recently had surgery and was very anxious beforehand. During the days prior to the operation, my cat was noticeably more cuddly than usual. She was always in the same room as me and slept in my bed every night, which is not her usual way. I feel like she was trying to comfort me. Is it possible for cats to react to your moods? If so, how?

  • Alamy
    11 of 17

    ANSWER:

    Yes, cats are very capable of reading human moods, especially the moods of humans they live with. We have no definitive answer as to why this is so. Do cats recognize human emotions because they share emotions similar to ours? Are they simply reacting to sensory cues? Or both? I believe that cats, like many other animals, are naturally empathetic, and in this case, your cat knew that you needed comfort and did her best to provide it. Your anxiety may also have transferred itself to her, so perhaps she was looking for a bit of reassurance as well.

  • PawNation.com
    12 of 17

    What inspired you to write "Taming Me: Memoir of a Clever Island Cat"?

  • Facebook: Taming Me: Memoir of a Clever Island Cat
    13 of 17

    ANSWER:

    I took a sick, feral kitten home after a trap-neuter-return operation, and courted her for many months before she decided to join our family, after which her life began to seem like a proverbial fairy tale. Her life story inspired "Taming Me," which is a heavily fictionalized rags-to-riches suspense tale, infused with Lucy Miracle's personality.

    RELATED: Get Your Copy of "Taming Me."

  • PawNation.com
    14 of 17

    What misconceptions do people have about cat training? 

  • Alamy
    15 of 17

    ANSWER:

    Many people think that cats cannot be trained, that they are independent creatures with minds of their own and no need for human companionship.  Thus, they do not try to train their cats at all. The reality is that while cats do indeed have minds of their own, those minds can be very receptive to human interactions and cues. Cats can learn to play ball, sit, stay, come and almost all of the behaviors that we normally associate with dogs. Talking, touching and positive reinforcement are powerful motivators for cats.

  • PawNation.com
    16 of 17

    How is training a cat different from training a dog?

  • Alamy
    17 of 17
    Next: More Expert Cat Advice

    ANSWER:

    Cats have different behaviors than dogs that must be dealt with. For example, we try to teach our cats not to scratch the furniture, while we try to teach our dogs not to chew the furniture.

    Some things are infinitely easier with a cat.  Show a cat the litter box once, and potty training is usually a done deal. With a puppy, potty training generally takes weeks. But in general, training a cat must be done repeatedly, patiently and at the cat's own pace. A dog is much more adaptable to the human's schedule and to intensive training.

    In the case of both cats and dogs, I recommend positive reinforcement as the motivator. Punishment can have a serious traumatic effect on a cat, while dogs can accept some punishment, as they are pack animals and used to a complex social structure. But repetition and positive reinforcement are the two things that are going to earn you the behavior, as well as the respectful, affectionate relationship with your animal that you want.