Python Stolen, Publicly Wrestled by Bumbling Burglars

By Paul Ciampanelli Sep 10th 2010

From Home Alone's Wet Bandits, to Jasper and Horace snatching dalmatian puppies for Cruella de Vil, to the cookie-craving crooks of Cookie Crisp cereal fame, there's a reason that bumbling thieves always come in pairs: Two idiots are funnier than one.

Case in a point: A duo of would-be reptile thieves raided an Australian pet store yesterday and made off with the shop's 8-year-old, five-foot python named Boris, according to the Associated Press. Then, insanely, and in defiance of the logic and good sense that nature gives most of us, the thieving pair brought Boris to a McDonald's restaurant and put on a show, wrestling the snake in the parking lot and thoroughly befuddling onlookers.

The robbers/wrestlers were later booked on charges of burglary and theft. Boris, who the pet shop's owner, Jodie Graham, claims is something of a store mascot is doing alright, although, "he was a bit cold and stressed so I have him in the tank warming up," Graham said. "I am just glad to get him back."

Unfortunately, a lizard stolen alongside Boris by the larcenous twosome remains missing.